On turning 27 without my Mother

I used to write a lot and every since I lost my mom I avoid it. Partly because it makes me sad and partly because everything I write ends up so dark. But I think this is something I need to face, so in efforts to maybe get it out I'll share a little bit about what I'm going through...here it goes.

On turning 27 without my Mother

I could easily say this will be my worst birthday ever.
I could easily say this was my worst year ever.
I could easily say I now know the meaning of extreme pain.
But nothing seems easy these days.

I could say that I miss you.
I could say that you live in my mind.
I could say  you llive in my heart.
But  saying it has no meaning anymore.

It seems unfair to continue to get older.
It seems unfair to laugh.
It seems unfair to cry.
Is it living if I'm merely getting by?

Six  months have passed and I still struggle to let you go.
As I turn 27 I can't help but remember,
Remember the person who gave me my life and also her own.
The person who would do anything to make me smile.
It feels wrong to live without you,
It feels wrong to love without you,
It feels empty to acomplish anything.

And yet I do, I get up and live my life.

I can't give up now.

Not after all you've done.

So in your honor, 

I keep living.

I keep loving.

I keep missing you.